In an act of desperation last weekend, I spent $20 on parking.
On my way to a work-related thing, I was in a rush, stressed by traffic, and not thinking clearly. I said, “eh, what the hell,” and pulled into a parking garage that I knew was going to be ridiculously expensive. To add insult to injury, there was parking across the street for half the price. It hurt a little.
But I added the $10 difference into my “money regrets” budget. I got the idea for this when I came across an interesting money saving suggestion from author Ramit Sethi:
“Keep a ‘Stupid Mistakes’ sub-savings account. Just the simple fact of having one will sharpen your focus on avoiding the mistakes in the first place. And when you do make a stupid mistake, you’ll be able to use your sub-savings account as a buffer to keep your automation system on track.”
It’s a little self-deprecating, but that’s the idea. We all make dumb money mistakes, and having an account dedicated to those mistakes will not only help fund them, but also let you see how much they’re costing you. Ideally, this will help you stop making them. But I take a different approach–one that focuses more on regretfulness. Silly, silly regretfulness.
Ugh. Money Regrets.
I’ve always held on to financial regret a bit longer than I should. It runs in my family, but I think a lot of frugal people have this problem. Here’s an example.
Last week, I went to an auto shop for some maintenance. The next day, I found a 50% off coupon from that shop in the mail. I called and asked if they’d refund the difference–they wouldn’t. “You’re still thinking about that coupon, aren’t you?” my boyfriend asked later that day. In fact, I thought about that coupon at random times over the next couple of days, and it annoyed me.
Regret is a waste of time. If you make a mistake, learn from it, but then let it go. And money goofs are simply going to happen sometimes, no matter what. How was I to know that coupon would come? It’s unproductive to keep thinking about something you can’t change.
Obviously, you want to let go of these regrets. And that sounds easy enough, but even now, as I think about that overpriced parking, I’m a little irritated. So here’s my solution for dealing with it.
My “Money Regrets” Budget
Unlike Sethi, I don’t have a dedicated account for my stupid mistakes. I don’t have a fund for them. Instead, I make a running tally of my financial screw-ups, and write them down. Then, I work on erasing them. Here’s how:
• By cutting back on something: A few days ago, I was in line at CVS, and I added a bag of sour Jelly Belly beans (my fave) to my purchase. Then, I considered my “money regrets” tally, and I put them back. I added $4 to the tally.
• With an unexpected windfall: Last week, my restaurant meal came out late, so the waiter deducted from my bill the $5 beer I ordered. I add that to the tally, too.
I do this until my “money regrets budget” is back to zero.
It might seem a little much, and my budget will likely even out whether I keep a tally or not. And I’m pretty damn sure I’ll buy that bag of Jelly Bellies at some point in the near future. But the point is–this process helps me stop worrying about dumb little money goofs that happen, inevitable or not. It makes me feel more in control. I know I’ll make up for that money, so I let it go.
Do you guys have a hard time with small money regrets like this? What’s your method for letting them go?
I think it’s a fabulous idea 🙂 Whatever it takes to feel good and accomplish the mission, right?
Thanks, J. Money! Yep, works for me. Makes me feel like I’ve undone those silly money missteps.
Well, it’s nice to know that I am not the only one who takes up too much of my mental energy with things like coupon regret! LOL I don’t actually have an account for moneyregrets but I do have a jar at home that I save up little bits of money for just such an occasion. It never gets higher than about $50-$75. If I don’t use up my “allowance” for the week (a small amount for unforeseen incidentals)I put it in the jar. Then when I spend stupid money, I take it out and put it back into that part of the budget to smooth over my guilt.
Oooh, I really like this idea, too. Haha, I’d say I’m glad you can relate, but it’s such a frustrating little hang-up!
Hi Kristen,
That is a unique way of tracking. You have gone a step further than having a category for these money mishaps. You have put a plan in place to maintain a zero balance in this area. That is taking action instead of just having a category that you can look at and regret even the more. I can tell you definitely are tracking our finances. Awesome! Thanks for sharing.
Well, thanks! I thought I was being too neurotic, and I questioned whether I should even post this. Glad I did!
The whole process you’ve described here is designed to help you think carefully about purchasing, and that’s got to be a good thing. I love the idea of a money regrets budget and using it like this. Thanks for sharing. 🙂
Thanks for commenting! Yes, I like the idea of anything that makes you a more mindful spender!
Hi Kristin :
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Regard
Leena Shah
Love the concept! Anticipation is the secret of financial success and keeping an account for financial mistakes is just the right thing to do.
OoOOoo I like that. Thanks, Simon!
I love that idea and your way of doing it. I’m also the type to stew over stupid money mistakes for a while. I’m usually not one to regret things, but I have a hard time letting go of the stupid stuff even though I know better. I know they are unavoidable, so I love that you’ve come up with something to address the emotional aspect of the mistake. Thanks for sharing!
Thanks mucho, Natalie! I know….I try not to stew, but I’ve found that this method is more effective than just telling myself to get over it! Definitely makes it easier to let go of those small regrets.
Last Saturday I took my 5 year-old daughter to her first college football game. We were running about 10 minutes slow and missed out on the free parking lot so I had to turn back and pay $10. Then she wanted a $3 water in the stadium. After the first quarter she was tired of all the yelling and wanted to go home. Little expenses like that really add up over time and drive me nuts. It’s hard to let mistakes like that go that I could have avoided with a little more planning. Fun experience with my daughter, but not as good as it could have been.
Awww I’m sure it was still worth it, though! I say keep the memory of fun times with your daughter, and toss out the memory of the parking flub 🙂
This is such a cool idea! It’s so easy to just sweep money mistakes/regrets under the rug by pretending they never happened (“I’ve had this umbrella the whole time! I definitely didn’t buy it as ANOTHER replacement for the last one I lost!”) but this keeps you aware, which is awesome. Good stuff!
Ha! I’ve definitely done the umbrella thing. Drives me nuts!
I wrote this up a few months ago (http://www.kingharis.com/?p=1478) as it’s what I have been doing for a while. A good corollary is to use these opportunities to develop better financial habits. Whenever I have a money regret, I try to zero out that budget by starting a new habit (like drinking coffee at home, not buying at work, etc) and trying to continue that habit after the budget is zeroed out.